Soldier

 Generations of military service goes back hundreds of years in our ancestry. Civil War, World War I, World War II, Korean War, Kuwait Invasion, Iraq War and current military service. It is in our genes and family heritage is important to everyone.

My niece "A" found out she was pregnant the Friday before Memorial Day 2001. She was at Fort Bragg with her husband, she was in COSCOM as a safety officer. She was about to be deployed to Iraq within 60 days. Then 9/11 happened. Her commitment to the Army was til 2003. Her baby boy was born March 2,2002. Her husband went to Okinawa, she stayed back at Fort Bragg to serve out the rest of her time. She asked Nan to come down to help her for six months. Nan quit her job and moved to Fayetteville and stay in the two bedroom apartment with "A".

Have you ever had the luxury of a clean house, all of your meals cooked with love, grocery store list complete and put away, plus a baby under 6 months, going to work every day? NO!NO!NO! Unless you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth. Nan rocked the little boy, walked through the park come rain or shine, sang lullabies, did the laundry, played patty cake, read books with her soft voice. It was an interesting relationship you build with someone who takes care of you when you are 26. You actually come to expect things done your way, when their way is the right way every day. 

Nan did not have any friends or family in that area, sometimes she was lonely. "A" would walk in the door with Nan asking her about her day, she just wanted to be left alone after a hard day on base dealing with soldiers and her commander. One day she snapped,"NAN will you just let me relax a little bit when I walk through the door??? I've been working all day and I come home and you give me all of this shit I have not done! Just let me relax for a little bit?" Nan jumped up in her face and said "Who do you think I have to talk to all day long? there is no one her for me, you are the first adult that I get to have every day! What do you expect?" Nan did not take any shit from any person especially her grandchildren. You are not born with respect but if you are not taught it by the time you are one year old you can't be in our family.

Military families are targets for telemarketers. "A" put a block on her phone so the ringing would not wake up the baby. When you called her line the first message would greet you with "this number is not recognized by the receiving party. Please record your name after the tone and the receiver will allow the call to come through."

Nan had a posse of 65 including her sisters, sons, daughters, aunts, uncles, cousins, church associates, friends and neighbors. Once these people started getting this standoff message there was outrage from her apartment to the tip of New York City. There were no cell phones, no texting, no zoom, no face time, only the friendly voice on the phone. "How is the baby?" "How do you like it down there, Nan?" "When are you coming home?" One night "A" came home from work, all of a sudden Nan handed her the phone. It was Nan's sister who she previously talked to every day. "Listen to me "A". Now listen to me right now. You can not have this block thing on your phone. You can not do this to me. We need to be able to speak to your grandmother, take the block off the phone immediately, do you understand me young lady?"

They were attacking her from all sides. Our family is a significant unit, they don't know how to be apart. They have to stay connected or they don't feel like a whole person.

WE ARE ONE!

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